
I probably got tired of it. Like everything else. I’m feel like I’m just getting over everything. I feel like I’m fucking thirty.
I’ve stopped smoking pot. And not consciously either. I didn’t go “This is bad for me, I should quit.” It just would never occur to me these days to do it. It’s probably a good thing, but it doesn’t seem to feel like it for some reason.
I have basically no interest in men. I mean like, I’ve probably been borderline obsessed with some guy, if only to keep me entertained, since I was.. what, thirteen? I have had at least seven years of always having some boy on my mind. I’ve probably trained myself to be constantly thinking about men, so even now I often feel this pulling to think about someone, even though there’s no one there. It’s… uncomfortable.
I don’t party as hard, or as often. I’m actually really fucking lame. Most days it comes down to: well I could spend at least $50 to go out, have an alright time, feel gross tomorrow OR I could stay home with my PS3. I’d like to think I’m getting more comfortable with myself, enjoying my time alone, but mostly it just feels like.. I just don’t give a fuck.
I’m not sure what exactly is responsible for my complete lack of interest in anything or anyone (besides myself) but this better just be a phase. I’m too young for this shit.
(PS, for anyone who cares, I’ll probably post more often.)
Factor1: Personality “Aggressive narcissism”
Glibness/superficial charm
Grandiose sense of self-worth
Pathological lying
Cunning/manipulative
Lack of remorse or guilt
Shallow affect (genuine emotion is short-lived and egocentric)
Callous/lack of empathy
Failure to accept responsibility for own actions
(Source: Wikipedia)

Audrey Kawasaki - Saying Goodbye
If anyone out there is seeking my love buy me this and I’ll be yours forever.